The Non-epic adventures of a moaning 20 something from her wheelchair and laptop
So Today was my third week at the Multiple Disciplinary Pain Management class. In honesty it feels like the Pain version of alcoholics anonymous BUT thats not a bad thing, Every one in the class is quite vibrant and I feel that every one is comfortable with each other. The Presentation parts of the therapy is interesting, Very useful how ever I struggle to consentrate I think we all do as we end up Makeing a comment that sparks discussions every few mins but I find that is usefull because we relate to the issues at hand, share our experiances and can often come to possible soloutions and ways to cope. Today was a little more intimate but again, I felt comfortable with it, There was no pressure to share but I was able to talk about the crash, for a few moments I felt a little anxious but then when another lady told her one of her experiences My attention was totaly wiped from my self Which may sound horrible but meeting people with the same and worse situations (depending on your view point) is a breath of fresh air. You always get told that “There’s always some one worse off” but when you sit down with thoes people who in some areas of there life are worse off personaly has made me feel more comfortable but then again I’m sure there are people in the group who consider me worse off too.
There are a few people who I get on with VERY well in the group and on the first day it was pretty interesting, Randomly Myself a muslim lady and a Christian lady (By which I mean Mosque and church going ) We were put in a group to introduce our selfs and as we got talking we briefly discussed religion and it was a NICE Discussion where we talked about the spiritual aid our religions bring in to our health and not the differences it was very interesting and quite funny how we all ended up together.
Anyway, Saturday is my birthday, And I’m off to stonehenge to perform the solstaice ritual I’m both Nourvous and exited I feel like a solstaice version of Bride-zilla, Solstaice-zilla I’m in the middle of a bit of a flare up and my brain wont let me concentrate, on the Plus side I have a CD from therapy today, guided meditation/relaxation stuff to try hope it helps!
-Hugs and butterfly kisses
Well, Just had my first day of the multiple diciplinary therapy, it went well. Was great to meet and speak to people in the same boat face to face. Although I did find it quite funny, we were told to split in to groups to meet eachother and introduce out self’s. Some how the two ladies I was with were heavily faithfull in religion the one lady was muslim The other Christian and there is me, Pagan/Wiccan. It was like an insult to an offencive joke “A Pagan, a christian and a Muslim In a hospital room…..” although to be honest it was a good experiance to talk to them both we went off on a tangent talking about our religion but not debateing we acctualy came to the conclusion although we all practice differently and follow seperate rules the important part of it is that we live our lives with out guilt and with respect for our fellow’s no matter race, religion, Gender ect but we all agreed that there were still extremests who would dissagree with us in all of our paths, From there on it only became more interesting as we discussed how our faith helps us for example the Islamic Lady who I think was called Ruby but I can’t remember (I’m Awful with names) she said that when she prays the movement and positions she takes helps her pain and if she ever has to take a few days away from praying for what ever reason it can make her ache more as she hasn’t practiced the slow yoga like positions. We then went on to discuss how diaphragm breathing can help releave stress as it delivers extra oxygen to the brain. I was then able to picth in when we were asked for examples of this breathing exersise I was able to chip in “Awen” chanting.
I meet some very interesting charecteres today and that was only one side of the room Next time I want to make more of an effort with the other side of the group although it is nearly obvious that the few who I associated more with today were the more confident in the group. I just hope that we weren’t over powering we seemed to get alot out of it today, I genuinely look forward to my next session :D
Hugs and Butterfly Kisses
Yesterday was agony my knee was like a baloon and so utterly painfull, I was so upset about it. I had put so much faith in the injections working and was too hopefull I suppose my own fault. I told my self not to get too exited about them but I did. And then I got saddened about it. I ordered a Kebab and brought a new game Reserving my relf back to the bed for how ever long this time-How ever today I woke up to my kitten crying on the stairs so I called him and he crawled in to my arms and I stayes in the same positiong snuggeling my cat my face buried in his fur enjoying his purrs but after a few mins I decided I had to move and I did and noticed a significant lack of pain compaired to yesterday. Its still painfull but at a level of pain I’m used to coping with although the hightened sensativity is still something I’m trying to work out.
I’ve returned to my Confused optimism state as the nurse said it may take a week to work its self out. So I’m going to give it the time it needs before seeing a doctor about it. It’s not like I have anything to win nor lose at this stage but I am curious while I’m still trying to snuff out that glimmer of faith and hope in it. If I carry on expecting it not to work I may be pleasantly surprised other wise If I expect it to work and it dosn’t I’ll just be dissapointed
xx Love and Butterfly Kisses xxx
First one is to give you an impression of what the blood was like after I came out. I’m a bit scared to take off my plaster. There’s not much to show shoulder wise but I promised some one who wanted to know about the procedure pictures. And yes I went to the hospital in daytime clothes and by dressing gown and came back in it because No one batts an eyelid at people in hospitals wareing dressing gowns
Didn’t sleep too well lastnight due to Nerves. I don’t understand for the last few months I’ve been quite chilled and relaxed about it, but yesterday that Needlephobia came out of no where and punched me in the face and Me recoiling trying not to worry about it ended up like Needle phobia had my arm and did the old “Stop hitting your self” routine! Thing is I acctually tried to knacker my self out but doing a bit of a tidy in my room Meh! didn’t work!
So after about 2 hours sleep mom comes in and starts waving like an upright epileptic fit, there was probably pourpous to it but as I didn’t have my glasses on I couldn’t see I took my meds and got up anyway. After getting ready slowly having kitty cuddles and coffees the Ambulatory transport arrives and as useuall the team were lovely guys. Meet another bloke who lives in harborne who was going in for his shoulders to be injected too he was a double leg amputee, he was lovely he spouted out a few of my jokes
Doctor:Take a seat
Him/me: Its ok I brought my own
Traffic sadly caused us to be 15 mins late but it wasn’t too bad I was in no rush. With me there is never any rush to be poked with needles… Even when I’m desperate but today I was ok I just let them get on with it, To an extent.
We put on the emla cream to numb my skin but by the time we saw them it had worn off which was not amusing but the doctors couldn’t help that after some time I was taken in to the theater and this time I got to go on the bed not just the chair but by this time I was shakeing like a leaf and that made me panic more about him getting the needle in my knee so we opted to do the double suprascrapular (shoulders) which went well He put the anesthetic needle in and I thorght that was all that was needed ,Silly me, After singing “Soft Kitty warm Kitty” I jumped as he brought a second needle to the area but then I calmed down to and extent where I tried to controll my breathing since a few months ago I spotted that I hold my breath when I have any kinda needle- Sadly I still went feint and Dizzy and quite sick
After that he did the second shoulder no problem just the regular dizzyness ect. then it was time for the big one in the knee. Having not known what he was going to do there exacly this was new for me- Totaly! So I lay down and looked at the ceeling still singing soft kitty and he popped the needle in only problem is as it hit the nerve I jumped and accidentily kicked the poor bloke. I felt awful but I’m almost sure it hurt me more it was utter agony as we bruteforced my leg in to position and let him cary on it was so hard to try keep the muscle relaxed and pretty odd too.
With the shoulder injections although they go in from my shoulder/back/neck area once the needle is in it feels like its in my armpit. The Knee injections went in from under the knee cap and felt like it was in from the back- Very spooky feeling in all honesty!
After Apolagising and thanking the doctor LOTS (I did feel awfull for kicking him sad part is- I’ve done this twice now when I had my oral surgery I accidentily kicked the anesthatist who was poping the canula in!) It took a few mins to come around my head was spinning and the nurse popped over to take my blood pressure . She noticed my knee was bleeding. Quite a bit but after she put some pressure on it cleared up and she put a fresh plaster on.
once my head cleared up every few mins I tested to see how my neck was going as the last time I felt like an owl having not realised I hadn’t turned my head all the way to the side in roughly 2 years. This time it took about half hour from the needle being done and my head being able to turn fully but can’t complain at that It still amazes me when it happens. My knee on the other hand just feels weird, for the first hour or so after it It felt like some one elses leg I could move it, but I had no feeling in it but no pain or numbness it just didn’t feel like it was mine, I’v had a nap now and rested and it still feels a bit weird- no pain no numbness It feels more like my leg now but the only way I can describe it is, It feels like some one has replaced the joint with a strong Baloon or bean bag its a little stiff but not awfull and there’s no pain and its not uncomfortable. Although it is very sensative right now I feel like the princess and the pea. There is a pillow that has a hole in it on my bed and some of the polystirine beads have come out I could feel each individual bead against my leg earlier which WAS uncomfortable but it dosn’t seem too bad now. The Nurse said it could be a week before I see any improvement So time will tell. I’m still optimistic, I’m giving my knee a day or two to rest but I’m going to start lifting some light weights and increase by 5 sets each day with my shoulders to try build up my strength.
Weeeell thats about all I suppose It went kind of well besides the knee jerk twitch stab needle kick doctor thing
Hugs and butter fly kisses
funny but also sad
Pretty true sadlyPoop
I need to update more often I have a feeling I haven’t due to my overwhelming finger crossing making it hard to type but here we go!
I was at the Pain Management Clinic a few weeks ago to Request another referral to have more injections on my shoulders as the last ones have worn off, While speaking to the woman I asked what the chances of having them on my knee were. Turns out there available and they can be done at the doctors surgery but since I’m having the big suprascrapular procedure on my shoulder they can do my knee at the same time . Worst case scenario with this is its looser and hurts less- This I know from the shoulder injections. Best case scenario I MAY be able to walk again should they work as well as the ones on my shoulder do (Baring in mind however that its a %50 chance as the Suprascrapular can only be done on the shoulder ,how ever, it’s the trigger point injections I’m having in my knee and my shoulder)
That had me rather exited for a while until I realised it’s not until next month.
Also I went to a consultation for “Multiple Disciplinary Pain Management” Which is a series of classes, sessions with physio’s, Phyciatrist’s, Dietitian’s ,Nurse’s and more. It runs for 10 weeks which will be interesting and It’s not like I have anything to loose. I was given 2 options.
Local; Every Tuseday for 10 weeks. 2 and a half hours.
Intense; 2 week stay in a Rehabilitation center in Bath, Tia chi, Meditation, Gym, Hydro therapy, ect
What I’ve done is been sensible while I want to go to the Bath course It’s could bring on another set back. Me and the doctor have agreed that if the 10 week programme is not any use or I could do with more/intense that I would be a better candidate to go and as it has to be funded if it shows that I have tried the local option first there is a greater chance they will fund it as accommodation and food is provided. I think I’ve done the right thing and decided to do it sensibly. Test the waters see how I go with this first lot.
It’s nice to be finaly listened to and know while it will take a while but I will eventually be on my feet again. The Fibro will be the only thing I will have to contend with once I’m up and about but if that’s all I have to battle…. Fine I know I’ll have good and bad days but at least I’ll have more good days
I actually managed to tie my hair in a pony tail a few days ago too and I haven’t had a seizure since last June which is awesome.
Once I get my injections first step is social life I’ve not seen some of my closest friends this year at all so as soon as I can wheel I’mma go see Logan and Meera. Then consider some of the other friends I haven’t seen in ages.